There wasn't nearly enough holding
kissing cuddling stroking
she became so fragile by the end
it felt as if she'd break if squeezed too tight
I washed her failing body more than once
almost unbearable
handle with care
cautious of crushing
painfully precious solid heavy distorted frangible flesh
clumsy as clay
precious as porcelain
It wasn't enough
there was a once
a moment
eternity of months ago
i kneeled and buried my face in her poor dear stomach
we wept
she stroked my hair
i can still feel her fingers
If only i could be back there still
not present in this here and now
she should be here to hold me
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loss sometimes demands to be recognised wallowed bathed submerged in indulged Felt A friend of a friend described it as the "dark luxur... -
not so lost for words these days pouring spewing out in jumbles inspiration of desperation I was not so wordy before nor ever so deeply sile...
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We'd known it was the last time though no one said this task you'd set upon with borrowed help in borrowed hours and days determined...
1 comment:
A hug and a holding for you ((x))
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